Write in a Journal
The idea is to get your thoughts and feelings down on paper. When we grieve, we experience many emotions, such as anger, envy, self-doubt, sadness, guilt, disappointment, and anxiety. It can be very therapeutic to get your feelings out, even on paper. Remember, no one has to read what you write. So be honest about what you're feeling at that moment.
Be gentle with yourself
Try not to judge yourself for not "doing better" or "keeping it together." You have suffered a significant loss, and it's going to take time to start adjusting to your new normal.
Keep structure in your day
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This means getting dressed and ready for the day even if you are not leaving the house. Try and set simple routines of waking up and going to sleep around the same time. Eat something at regular meal times (even if small)
Accept your grief
Trying to suppress or run and hide from your grief will only worsen it long term. You need to experience the pain and sorrow to be able to start healing. It's ok to look at pictures and think of the memories and let out a good cry. You may find that setting a timer for 15 minutes to feel that each day will be therapeutic. Once the timer is over, focus on what's around you and even write down things you have or people you are thankful for. It's hard to concentrate and do but make an effort and journal to see how you progress.
Some days I feel as if I’m conquering the world in your honor; and some days I feel as if I’m lost in the heartache of your absence.
Serve others
This was a big one for me and healing. When we take a few moments out of the day to serve others, it takes the focus off our pain and can make us feel empowered, if even only temporarily. It can be as simple as seeing a heartfelt text, calling someone to let them know they are appreciated or baking a treat for the neighbors.
Honor your loved one
Often after someone passes, it feels as if the world forgets about them, which can cause more grief. Supporet a cause near and dear to their heart. It could be paying it forward one day out of the year with a note attached. Do something they loved. Complete an unfinished project they may have.
Move your body
It's easy to get into the habit of wanting to isolate or stay inside, taking 15 minutes every day to get outside and go on a little walk or take the time to stretch out in the sunshine. This is not only good for your state of mind but it helps us to start recognizing the beauty that still is around us, especially when your world feels so dark.
Blow off some anger
You can visit a place that allows you to break items like glassware, go ax throwing, chop firewood, or even find an area for an easy clean-up and find an old dish and smash it. Sometimes you have to release that anger and put a physical activity with it.
Tips for helping those going through grief
Check In
Check-in on them regularly by sending a text or calling to let them know you are thinking of them.
Mention their loved one
They often feel forgotten by the world and it's important for the person to be able to hear stories and their name mentioned.
Tasks
Be specific with a task you are going to do for them. You can offer to mow the lawn, pickup groceries, and bring dinner.
Listen
Don't offer advice unless asked. Sit with them wether in silence or listen to what they have to say.